No,...Lucky Mama

Mary Whidden and James Phillips share about their daughter Langley- they also gave an overview of their China adoption experience.

My Photo
Location: Indiana, United States

Monday, January 31, 2005

Last Social Worker Visit

Shirley- our social worker- came to visit us for the last time (until post placement) on Thursday. She asked if we had any questions and told us we would be wonderful parents- YIPEE!! She said we passed our home study and she would have the report to ASIA by today. In fact she called last night as she was typing it up to ask about our driving records and if we are on city water. She said she was emailing the copy to them right after she got off the phone.
Once the home study gets to ASIA they have to approve it, check for typos and edit for international adoptions. They do this on Wednesdays- when I called last week they said there was a chance this wouldn't get done until next Wednesday (but I am praying that they get to us this week.)
After all is approved they send it to BCIS and we wait for our I-171 to come (should be about three weeks). When that is in we go to ASIA and get all of our documents Notarized. Then they are sent to the Chinese consulate for authentication- that usually takes about a week (it would be longer, but we are in DC- so it is very close).
When all that is done the entire set of documents (now called a completed dossier) are sent to China and Logged in- from the Log-In-Date (LID) it is about a six month wait for a referral.
We are hoping to have a LID in March. Please pray and keep your fingers crossed!
Update you more soon.
It still doesn't feel quite real that we have the Home Study done.

Friday, January 21, 2005

Mary's Visit

I had my Social Worker visit last night- and our refrence visit was also at the begining of that so Mel was there too. I hope it went OK. She sent me to my room when she talked to Mel- so I have no idea what was said.
During my part she basically asked sbout my life- growing up, education, how great my parents were, ect. I tend to babble when I am nervous, so I probably talked her ear off- but at least it is done.
One more visit to go.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Jamie's Visit

Jamie had his "alone" visit with the Social Worker last Thursday. I tried all morning to get in touch with him, we know I am a bit fruity about the whole thing, and much more nerous than he. Anyway after two hous of trying to reach him he finally called. He wanted to know what was wrong- nothing I told him- How did the visit go?- Fine, Not really anything to tell. So I worried myself sick for nothing, but that is much better than worring myself about something that happened! My "alone" visit is on Thursday- now I can start to worry about that.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005


Most of you already know this- but for those of you who do not- the name of our little girl will be Langley Elizabeth Phillips.
Langley is a family name (on Mary's mother's side). Jamie was uncertain about the name until I looked it up on a Chinese web site. The two parts of Langley break down like this in China and are pronounced pretty much the same:
Lang- means bright or clear
Li- means beautiful
So Langley will be bright and beautiful! I am pretty sure the names aren't combined like this in China, but we still thought that was really neat (and maybe even a sign). Now Jamie is very happy with the name.
Elizabeth is for Mary's sister and Jamie's great-aunt. It also happens to be one of my all time favorite names.

Friday, January 07, 2005


I called Maryland CJIS today and out to see what the hold-up with our FBI clearances were (did I do something I don't remember?). But they said all is well, they are done and we should recieve them in the mail next week. Sometimes I think they just sit on these things until you actually call and ask for them- like if you never ask they can save 37 cents and just not send them to you!

Wednesday, January 05, 2005


Thanks for your prayers Shelia and Nanette- it is good to hear from you!!

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Bai Jia Bei (100 Good Wishes Quilt)

I wanted to post this here- so that all of you can do me a huge favor, help me make a Bai Jia Bei, or 100 Good Wishes Quilt for my baby! Everyone please send me a peice of fabric for her! Please Read On:

As all of you know- Jamie and I are in the process of adopting a child from China (prayers are welcome). I am starting a project for our child- hopefully we will have our paperwork done soon so the waiting can begin. And with the waiting comes time…so I would like to make a 100 Good Wishes Quilt for our daughter. And for this I need some help from you!
To welcome and celebrate a new life, there is a tradition in the northern part of China to make a Bai Jia Bei, or 100 Good Wishes Quilt. It is a custom to invite friends and family to contribute a patch of cloth with a wish for the baby. Part of the patch of cloth goes into the quilt for the baby, and the other part of the cloth can go into a creative memory notebook with the wish for the child. The quilt contains the prayers, luck, energy, and good wishes from all the families and friends who contributed a piece of fabric. Select a fabric that is meaningful to you, it doesn’t have to be new- a project you started but didn’t finish, a piece of skirt, something you thought was pretty at Walmart or if you are a parent it can be from a child’s clothing. (In China, these quilts were originally made from garments of family and friends, which would surround the child with luck/good wishes.)
The purpose of the 100 Good wishes quilt is to create a quilt with each of the quilting squares associated with a specific person/wish. This type of quilt is common in China and has become popular in the Chinese adoption community. The person sending the piece of fabric also sends a wish on a piece of paper for a scrapbook for the person who will eventually receive the quilt. The wish can be for good health, something religious or some other positive life outcome. The piece of fabric should be 100% cotton and prewashed (I can wash it- no biggy). The square should be a 12x12 inch piece of fabric (or there around) then we can cut it to the correct size (no I don’t know what that is yet). It is ideal if you place a small piece of the fabric on the paper containing the wish so that we can associate the wish with the fabric and the person who sent the fabric.
The Wish: Your wish and the way it is presented can be as simple or as elaborate as you want it to be. The wish might be a prayer, favorite poem, a heart felt random thought, a Bible verse or a quote. You can write it on an index card, white paper, stationary, lined paper, acid free paper- whatever you like. You can hand write or use a computer, make it scrap-booky or stamped - whatever you like- this is your wish/prayer for our daughter, we want it to reflect your personality- mine is a no frills piece of stationary with a wish written on it. I can put a piece of the fabric with the wish- don’t worry about attaching it.
Some of the wishes I have read include- I wish you more good hair days than bad hair days, I wish for you to find the love of God, I wish for you happiness …… Let your personality shine!
I know this quilt will be cherished by our daughter- whenever we get her.
Mary Whidden (and Jamie Phillips)
Our address is:
Mary Whidden & Jamie Phillips
11370 Evans Trail #202
Beltsville, MD 20705

First Visit

So we had our first Social Worker visit this morning- she is very nice. We basically sat around the dining room table for a couple of hours and talked. Then before she left I showed her the rest of the place- I didn't want all that cleaning to go to waste.
We talked about ourselves a ton, about how we met, why we wanted to adopt, child discipline and a miriad of ther things. She said she saw no reason why we shouldn't be approved (I did a secret dance of joy) and if anything came up she would let us know immediately. But lets face it Jamie and I lead pretty boring lives so we don't foresee anything popping up.
We scheduled the other visits this morning and our homestudy should be completed and typed up and submitted by February 10- at the latest. YEAH!

Monday, January 03, 2005

Visit Post-Poned

Minor setback- the Social Worker called last Thursday- she has an ear infection and we rescheduled the visit for tomorrow (Tuesday) at 9:00 am. I am a little disappionted- but I can't be mad that she is sick, besides it gave me more time to clean (and freak out about cleaning). The good thing is that she seemed really nice on the phone!